The foundation of any relationship, whether it be with a Business associate, spouse, parent, client or, friend, is trust. Trust is not something that can be built with quick fix techniques. Rather, it is something that is cultivated through consistent habits in your interactions. The following are twelve patterns of behavior that increase trust in your relationships.

1. Be transparent

Do not try to hide things from others. Refuse to have any hidden agendas. You might think you can pull a fast one on someone else. You can’t. Most people have good intuition and even though they may not be able to consciously determine that you are hiding something, they very likely will have an uneasy feeling around you. If they don`t feel comfortable around you, they won't be able to trust you.

Another sinister aspect of having hidden agenda is that it erodes your ability to trust others. You will assume that if you aren’t fully forthcoming, other people aren’t either. When you are trustworthy, however, you will see others as more trustworthy too.

2. Be sincere

This is similar to the previous point. Only say what you mean. Be impeccably honest with your words. Refuse to try and craft your words to manipulate others. Don`t give fake compliments, patronize others or say something just because you think you are supposed to. Again, people have good BS detectors. When others know that you only speak genuinely, it increases their capacity to trust you. Everyone loves authenticity.

3. Focus on adding value

In any relationship, always have the best interest of others at heart. Work hard to give as much or more than you get. When you consistently add value to someone`s life, they not only feel like you are on their side, they also have the urge to reciprocate. In Business relationships, this means always under-promise and over-deliver. In personal relationships, focusing on meeting the needs of the other person instead of taking in order to get your own needs met.

4. Be present

The last thing anyone wants is to have a conversation with someone who isn’t there. Instead of retreating into your head, focus on listening to others. Whenever you are with someone, make them your primary focus. Don’t think about work while you are at Home talking to your spouse. Don’t think about life at Home when you are with a client. When it comes to relationships, presence means quality time and quality time builds trust.

5. Always treat people with respect

Ever since we were little kids, we have been taught to be respectful. However, when our standards get violated or there is no one around to see (read: we don`t think there will be any consequences), we can often engage in petty behavior. This encompasses a wide range of actions from personal attacks during arguments to gossiping behind someone’s back.

Always remember that another person’s inherent worth as a human being entitles them to be treated with dignity. When people know that you will always treat with them respect, it is very natural for trust to flourish.

6. Take responsibility

When you mess up, which you invariably will, be quick to clean it up. Skip the excuses and just take responsibility. Justifying and making excuses may help you in the short term but in the long run, it does nothing for your character or the level of trust you are given. Accountability is a rare trait these days with most people wanting to avoid negative consequences at all costs. Dare to be different and you will win the trust of others.

7. Focus on feedback

Unless you`re a mind reader, the only way you can know how well a relationship is going is by getting feedback from the other person. Be not only willing to accept feedback – actively seek it out. Many people are afraid to give you feedback, especially if its negative, out of fear that they will offend. Ask with sincerity and respond respectfully and others will be far more willing. Take both the positive and negative into account along with your own judgment and adjust your behaviour accordingly.

8. Take criticism well

Learn to handle criticism with grace. Instead of getting defensive, consider the possibility that what the other person is saying might be true. Closing yourself off from criticism has the effect of closing off all communication.

In some cases, the criticism may indeed be inaccurate. In these instances, you have the opportunity to show empathy. Try to understand the problem from the other person’s point of view. Perhaps the criticism is just a thinly veiled attack that stems from a deeper upset they may have with you. In these cases, your willingness to dig deeper without getting defensive will certainly enhance the trust in the relationship.

9. Set boundaries

Be clear about how you expect people to behave around you. Again, do this in a mature manner: be sincere and respectful. When you have clear standards, people know exactly how to behave around you and that gives them certainty. The strength that you communicate by setting boundaries builds trust – when someone knows that they can`t take advantage you that alleviates the fear that someone else will.

10. Be a class act

Hold yourself to a higher a standard. Be quick to apologize when you know you are wrong. Only speak well of others, even those who don`t speak well of you.

Why should you do this? First, imagine what it would do to your sense of self to know that other people only have good experiences with you. Second, imagine how much trust such behaviour engenders in others. Finally, imagine the example you set for others – the conduct of others will improve just by being around you consistently.

11. Your word is your bond

Keep all the promises you make and ensure that you make promises only sparingly. Make your word stronger than any written contract. Refuse to make empty promises and manipulate people.

When a promise you have made is no longer beneficial to you, instead of deciding to not follow through, attempt to renegotiate the deal. When you renegotiate the agreement, ensure that the new commitment provides even more value to the other person.

12. Be consistent

Above all, be consistent in your behavior. Don’t engage in the behavior once in a while when it seems convenient. Your consistency is the key to your trustworthiness. Small actions add up and a track record of high character is invaluable in any relationship. Become intensely principle-centered and trust will follow easily and consistently.

無論是與你的商業夥伴
、伴侶
、父母
、客(ke)戶(hu)或(huo)者(zhe)朋(peng)友(you)
，任(ren)何(he)一(yi)種(zhong)關(guan)係(xi)建(jian)立(li)的(de)基(ji)礎(chu)都(dou)是(shi)信(xin)任(ren)。信(xin)任(ren)的(de)建(jian)立(li)不(bu)是(shi)一(yi)蹴(cu)而(er)就(jiu)的(de)，相(xiang)反(fan)，它(ta)是(shi)在(zai)您(nin)一(yi)貫(guan)的(de)交(jiao)往(wang)習(xi)慣(guan)中(zhong)日(ri)益(yi)醞(yun)釀(niang)出(chu)來(lai)的(de)。下(xia)麵(mian)12種行事準則將有助於您在人際交往中建立信任。

1
、行為透明

不bu要yao試shi圖tu對dui別bie人ren隱yin瞞man什shen麼me。不bu要yao秘mi密mi地di計ji劃hua議yi程cheng。你ni也ye許xu認ren為wei你ni有you把ba握wo對dui某mou人ren耍shua些xie小xiao手shou段duan。其qi實shi你ni不bu能neng。大da多duo數shu人ren的de直zhi覺jiao都dou很hen敏min銳rui，即ji使shi他ta們men不bu能neng確que定ding你ni在zai隱yin瞞man些xie什shen麼me，但dan他ta們men能neng感gan覺jiao得de到dao。如ru果guo他ta們men和he你ni在zai一yi起qi感gan到dao不bu舒shu服fu，那na麼me他ta們men就jiu不bu會hui信xin任ren你ni。

隱yin瞞man的de另ling一yi個ge消xiao極ji作zuo用yong就jiu是shi它ta讓rang你ni不bu再zai信xin任ren別bie人ren。你ni會hui假jia想xiang如ru果guo自zi己ji不bu坦tan誠cheng，別bie人ren也ye一yi定ding不bu會hui坦tan誠cheng。反fan過guo來lai說shuo，如ru果guo你ni自zi己ji是shi值zhi得de信xin任ren的de，你ni也ye會hui覺jiao得de別bie人ren和he你ni一yi樣yang值zhi得de信xin任ren。

2

、待人坦誠

這zhe與yu第di一yi條tiao很hen相xiang似si。說shuo出chu你ni真zhen正zheng所suo想xiang。要yao絕jue對dui說shuo真zhen話hua。避bi免mian試shi圖tu編bian造zao謊huang言yan去qu操cao縱zong他ta人ren。不bu要yao刻ke意yi恭gong維wei讚zan美mei，說shuo一yi些xie別bie人ren愛ai聽ting的de話hua。如ru前qian者zhe所suo述shu
，人ren們men都dou有you很hen強qiang的de分fen辨bian力li。當dang別bie人ren發fa現xian你ni說shuo的de那na些xie話hua都dou是shi出chu自zi真zhen心xin時shi，他ta們men就jiu會hui信xin任ren你ni。每mei個ge人ren都dou喜xi歡huan真zhen誠cheng。

3
、調整價值觀

buguanshihezhongguanxi，yaoshizhongbabierendeliyifangzaixinzhong。nuliqugeiyu，shiqixiangdangyuhuochaochuzijidesuode。dangnibuduandiweibierendailaijiazhideshihou
，bierenbujinjinhuirenweinishizhanzaitamennayibiande，tamenyehuinuliquhuibaoni。zaiyewulaiwangzhong，zhejiuyiweizhegeiyuyaodayuchengnuo。zaigerenjiaowangzhong，zeshiyaozhiliyuduoduomanzubierendexuyao，erbushixiangbierenyiweidisuoqiu。

4、心神一致

沒有人願意和一個心不在焉的人談話。

和別人在一起是，不要三心二意，要注意聽別人在講什麼。不論和誰在一起
，都要把他/她ta當dang作zuo自zi己ji關guan注zhu的de焦jiao點dian。當dang你ni和he你ni的de妻qi子zi聊liao天tian的de時shi，就jiu不bu要yao再zai想xiang工gong作zuo上shang的de事shi情qing。當dang你ni和he客ke戶hu談tan生sheng意yi的de時shi

，也ye不bu要yao想xiang家jia裏li的de事shi。專zhuan心xin使shi你ni提ti高gao了le時shi間jian利li用yong率lv，在zai人ren際ji關guan係xi上shang，它ta幫bang你ni建jian立li了le信xin任ren。

5
、始終尊重別人

在我們很小時，父母就教導我們要要尊重別人。然而，一旦我們的準則遭到侵犯，或無人注意我們時（並且認為沒有人會回應我們），我們經常會有一些不雅行為。這個涵蓋範圍很廣，包括與人爭論時搞人身攻擊，或背後說人壞話。

你(ni)要(yao)始(shi)終(zhong)記(ji)得(de)，任(ren)何(he)一(yi)個(ge)人(ren)都(dou)是(shi)值(zhi)得(de)我(wo)們(men)去(qu)尊(zun)重(zhong)的(de)。當(dang)別(bie)人(ren)發(fa)現(xian)你(ni)始(shi)終(zhong)都(dou)是(shi)發(fa)自(zi)內(nei)心(xin)的(de)尊(zun)重(zhong)他(ta)時(shi)
，他(ta)對(dui)你(ni)的(de)信(xin)任(ren)也(ye)就(jiu)自(zi)然(ran)而(er)然(ran)的(de)加(jia)深(shen)了(le)。

6、承擔責任

如ru果guo你ni總zong是shi把ba事shi情qing弄nong糟zao的de話hua，那na麼me盡jin快kuai的de處chu理li好hao。不bu要yao隻zhi是shi道dao歉qian，要yao負fu起qi你ni的de責ze任ren。短duan時shi間jian內nei來lai看kan道dao歉qian也ye許xu對dui你ni有you用yong
，但dan從cong長chang遠yuan來lai講jiang這zhe對dui你ni的de品pin行xing或huo信xin任ren的de樹shu立li毫hao無wu用yong處chu。敢gan於yu承cheng擔dan責ze任ren已yi經jing成cheng為wei了le現xian代dai人ren的de一yi個ge稀xi有you的de品pin質zhi。大da家jia都dou在zai忙mang著zhe想xiang盡jin辦ban法fa去qu避bi免mian那na些xie負fu麵mian的de消xiao極ji的de結jie果guo。在zai這zhe一yi點dian上shang
，如ru果guo你ni敢gan於yu講jiang真zhen話hua，你ni將jiang會hui贏ying得de別bie人ren的de信xin任ren。

7、關注反饋意見

除(chu)非(fei)你(ni)會(hui)讀(du)心(xin)術(shu)，唯(wei)一(yi)可(ke)以(yi)知(zhi)道(dao)你(ni)的(de)關(guan)係(xi)處(chu)的(de)如(ru)何(he)的(de)方(fang)法(fa)就(jiu)是(shi)從(cong)他(ta)人(ren)口(kou)中(zhong)得(de)到(dao)反(fan)饋(kui)。不(bu)要(yao)坐(zuo)著(zhe)等(deng)反(fan)饋(kui)上(shang)門(men)
，要(yao)主(zhu)動(dong)去(qu)尋(xun)找(zhao)，特(te)別(bie)是(shi)別(bie)人(ren)不(bu)敢(gan)說(shuo)出(chu)口(kou)負(fu)麵(mian)意(yi)見(jian)。要(yao)真(zhen)誠(cheng)
，客(ke)氣(qi)地(di)去(qu)問(wen)
，別(bie)人(ren)就(jiu)會(hui)很(hen)樂(le)意(yi)告(gao)訴(su)你(ni)了(le)。把(ba)肯(ken)定(ding)和(he)否(fou)定(ding)的(de)綜(zong)合(he)在(zai)一(yi)起(qi)並(bing)加(jia)以(yi)判(pan)斷(duan)，然(ran)後(hou)對(dui)自(zi)己(ji)的(de)行(xing)為(wei)做(zuo)出(chu)一(yi)些(xie)合(he)理(li)的(de)調(tiao)整(zheng)。

8、接受批評

學會優雅地對待批評，而不是一味地防守，或許別人是對的。反對批評隻會使你切斷一切交流的途徑。

youxieshihoubierendepipingyexuzhendehenbudui。zaizhezhongqingkuangxia

，yaoshizhecongbierendejiaodulaifaxianwentisuozai。huoxuzhezhishipipingzheduininbumandejianjiedebiaoshi。zheshi，ruguonijiwangbujiuquezhenchengdixianglejiegengduodexingwei，dinghuishinizaijiaowangzhonggengjiazhidexinren。

9、設定界限

nongqingchu
，nixiangrangbierenzainimianqianyouzenyangdexingweijuzhi。hehuoqufankuiyijianyiyang，nixuyaoduibierenbiaoxianchuzhenchenghezunzhong。dangniyouleyigemingquedebiaozhun，dajiayedoumingbailehenijiaowangdexingweichidu，zhehuishitamenhenixiangchuqilaibuzaixinlimeipu。shedingjiexiandejiaoliutongyangshinikexin

，yixierenjiumingbailemeiyoubanfaliyongniyejiujianshaolebierenhuiliyongnidedanxin。

10、表現出色

給自己製定一個更高的標準。當你意識到自己做錯的時候要趕快道歉。稱讚別人，即使那些人不喜歡你。

為什麼要這麼做呢？首先，想一想那些對你印象好的人，這意味著什麼；其次，想一想這麼做會你增加多少信任度；最後，想想你樹立的這個榜樣——常和你呆在一起的人也會因此改善自己的行為舉止。

11
、重信守諾

遵守諾言，且不要輕易許諾。要讓你的諾言比那些文本合同還要有效。

如(ru)果(guo)曾(zeng)經(jing)的(de)諾(nuo)言(yan)已(yi)經(jing)不(bu)易(yi)於(yu)實(shi)現(xian)，不(bu)要(yao)悔(hui)言(yan)，試(shi)著(zhe)就(jiu)這(zhe)個(ge)事(shi)情(qing)重(zhong)新(xin)談(tan)判(pan)。並(bing)確(que)保(bao)經(jing)過(guo)重(zhong)新(xin)談(tan)判(pan)達(da)成(cheng)的(de)新(xin)協(xie)議(yi)
，能(neng)給(gei)別(bie)人(ren)帶(dai)來(lai)更(geng)多(duo)的(de)好(hao)處(chu)。

12

、始終如一

最重要的一點：始(shi)終(zhong)如(ru)一(yi)。不(bu)要(yao)貪(tan)圖(tu)一(yi)時(shi)便(bian)利(li)而(er)改(gai)變(bian)它(ta)。保(bao)持(chi)你(ni)的(de)一(yi)貫(guan)做(zuo)法(fa)是(shi)你(ni)贏(ying)得(de)信(xin)任(ren)的(de)金(jin)鑰(yao)匙(chi)。一(yi)個(ge)小(xiao)的(de)舉(ju)動(dong)，一(yi)次(ci)高(gao)品(pin)質(zhi)的(de)體(ti)現(xian)在(zai)您(nin)的(de)人(ren)際(ji)關(guan)係(xi)中(zhong)的(de)價(jia)值(zhi)都(dou)不(bu)可(ke)估(gu)量(liang)。堅(jian)持(chi)按(an)準(zhun)則(ze)辦(ban)事(shi)

，信(xin)任(ren)就(jiu)會(hui)如(ru)影(ying)而(er)隨(sui)。