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Therapist Frank Pittman believes virtually all cheaters deeply regret straying. "Infidelity is the most devastating crisis for a family," said Pittman. "It creates an atmosphere of simmering anger, secrets and dishonesty," he says. Some estimates suggest half of divorces involve infidelity. But Pittman says couples can take preventive steps. Here are some pointers and tips: 1. Stay faithful yourself If you don't want your spouse to stray, don't have an affair, either. Many affairs are sparked by revenge. 2. Don't marry a cheater If your husband strayed from his former wife to be with you, then he could leave you for someone else. 3. Normalize lust It's OK to be attracted to other people; just don't act on it. It's also acceptable to let your spouse know you find a celeb attractive. But don't let your eye wander checking out every hottie that walks by. 4. Don't share your marital woes with co-workers They may be sick of hearing about it and say "If you don't like her, divorce her", just to be done with it. Or it can pull you and another disgruntled spouse closer together. 5. If you're thinking about having an affair, the best thing you can do is telling your spouse. "You can say, 'I have noticed we have not had sex in a year,' " says Pittman. This way they can work on intimacy issues and prevent the affair. 6. Stay off the computer If you are intimately connected to someone online, that's a red flag. Focus more on the intimacy in your relationship at home. |
治療學家弗蘭克·皮特曼認為，幾乎所有的婚姻背叛者都會為自己的出軌深感後悔。 皮特曼說：“對於一個家庭來說，不忠貞是個最具毀滅性的危機。它會讓家庭充滿怨恨、猜忌和欺騙。” 據估計，有一半的婚姻破裂都是由不忠造成的。而皮特曼醫生說，夫婦們可采取一些預防性措施。以下是一些具體的意見和建議： 1． 自己要保持忠貞 如果不想讓配偶出軌，你自己也要忠貞。很多婚外情都緣於報複。 2．不要嫁給“負心郎”。 如果你的丈夫背叛了他的前妻和你在一起，那麼他可能也會背叛你和別人在一起。 3．保持適度的欲望 被bei別bie人ren吸xi引yin是shi正zheng常chang的de，但dan不bu要yao有you所suo行xing動dong。讓rang你ni的de配pei偶ou知zhi道dao你ni對dui一yi個ge名ming人ren很hen著zhe迷mi也ye未wei嚐chang不bu可ke，但dan不bu要yao讓rang眼yan睛jing總zong停ting留liu在zai每mei個ge從cong你ni身shen邊bian走zou過guo的de美mei女nv身shen上shang。 4．不要將你婚姻的不幸告訴同事 他們可能煩於聽你說這些，為了敷衍你，他們會說：“如果不愛她了，就離婚吧”。或者，這可能會拉近你和另一個對婚姻狀況不滿的人的關係。 5．如果你動了搞婚外情的念頭，最明智的做法是告訴你的配偶。 皮特曼建議，“你可以這樣說，‘我覺得我們好像一年都沒有性生活了。’”他們可以采用這種方式處理好曖昧關係，從而防止婚外情。 6．遠離電腦 如果你和某個網友聯係密切，這可是個危險信號。將更多的注意力放在和配偶的關係上。 |
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